Definition of a Conservative.

Recently, whilst brushing up on my geology, I found this definition:

Conservative - A contaminant that moves with the same velocity as water.

"A contaminant" OK, I agree with that. A conservative is a contaminant. "...moves with the same velocity as water." Hmmm..? I've seen water move pretty fast, I'm not so sure about conserv....... Wait, of course, Bill Clinton! Conservatives are always fast to blame their fuck-ups on Bill (and now on George W., because even though they enabled and supported him in all his fuck-ups, now that his numbers are down he is, apparently, no longer a conservative and therefore can be held up to scrutiny and critique). Oh yeah, they are also pretty quick when they try to destroy social safety nets and to lower taxes for the wealthy and big business, lining the pockets of family and friends, and their own pockets, as a result. (Hey, there ain't nothin' wrong with a little taste is there?! Is there??!?).

Yes, I agree with that definition.

David Hicks Luxury

The US prosecutor preparing the case against Australian terrorism suspect David Hicks said he expected the Australian to be charged by the end of the week.
Colonel Mo Davis also denied that Hicks was being held in harsh conditions and rejected claims the Australian was shackled to the floor of his cell in conditions that resembled a Nazi concentration camp.
"I just wanted to make sure that that was bogus, so I called to check on his condition and I'm told everything's fine," he told ABC Radio.

Well that seals it for me, the prosecutor called and they said "Fine man, no problemo.!."

I can just see that bastard Hicks swanning around the crescent shaped pool, sipping upon rare tisanes from the far east and enjoying surf and turf every night as he watches the Simpsons.

Hell, look at the pic, it's like my last holiday in Bangkok. How could anyone possibly think otherwise?

Meh.............

George W Bush, Cocaine, Abortion and Sodomy.

You know the Bible 92%!

Wow! You are awesome! You are a true Biblical scholar, not just a hearer but a personal reader! The books, the characters, the events, the verses - you know it all! You are fantastic!

Ultimate Bible Quiz
Create MySpace Quizzes

Just did this quiz and as you can see I got 92%, the funny thing is that the last question was "Do you read the bible?" My answer was no, but still the stupid thing congratulates me on reading the silly book. Oh well, you know these christians, they are quite happy to ignore the answers that are in front of them and make up their own reality.

Yes!! It's the Jonnys'

The Mechanical Contrivium is Back!!!

The Mechanical Contrivium

Now that Saddam is dead let's see what the Contrivium has to say about him.

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Saddam hussein!

1. US gold coins used to say 'In saddam hussein we trust'.
2. Saddam hussein can't drink - he absorbs water from his surroundings by osmosis.
3. The international dialling code for saddam hussein is 672!
4. In Chinese, the sound 'saddam hussein' means 'bite the wax tadpole'!
5. Neil Armstrong first stepped on saddam hussein with his left foot.
6. If you lick saddam hussein ten times, you will consume one calorie.
7. It is bad luck to walk under saddam hussein!
8. Saddam hussein cannot burp - there is no gravity to separate liquid from gas in his stomach.
9. Scientists have discovered that saddam hussein can smell the presence of autism in children!
10. Donald Duck's middle name is saddam hussein!

Look out Barak Obama...!..., Donald Duck is after your notoriety.

The Preznits Speech.

President George W. Bush lets the American people know what he thinks of their feelings about the war.

Haditha Shows Civvie Deaths Par for the Course. No Care = No Foul.

Marine officers said Chessani, the Marines' battalion commander, informed his superior, the regimental commander, of the civilian casualties the day they occurred and was told by that officer, Col. Stephen W. Davis, that no investigation was needed.

"There was nothing out of the ordinary about any of this, including the number of civilian dead, that would have triggered anything in my mind that was out of the norm," Davis told military investigators, according to a transcript. "There is nothing about this incident that jumped out at any point to us."

WTF? Civilian deaths at U.S. hands is the norm!!??

Glenn Reynolds on Republican Presidents.

"It's as if the only good Republican President is a dead Republican President."

You said it Glenn!!!

Heh, indeed!